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Fighting Depression #17 – NOT the good fight. | March 26, 2017

The past four days have been really bad.  I’m stressing out over money, stressing out over everything, and doing the ostrich-head-in-the-sand thing.

Really, haven’t done much… sit around, play video games, watch telly/movies/wrestling.  Eat.  Take Smiley for walks.  Took showers most days (missed one.)

Yesterday, started to realise how bad I’d been.  Instead of beating myself up over it, decided I was going to have a good evening and then some productive days.

This week, starting Wednesday, and running through next Sunday, I’ll be seeing twelve wrestling shows in the Orlando area.  Next Sunday is Wrestlemania, and every year, a butt-load of wrestling shows and seminars and Q&A/Meet and Greets go to where Wrestlemania is happening and put on shows.  This year, Wrestlemania is in Orlando.

I bought a ticket package from WWN Live last Summer (early Fall?) when they released the tickets.  That’s eleven of the twelve shows right there, and then I bought a ticket for a new company earlier this year.

So, I’m excited for that, but also feeling sorry for myself b/c I don’t have the money I would have (I had money saved up for the occasion, but I’ve been using that money to help pay bills the last couple months, and it’s pretty much gone) to spend on shirts and merchandise to support the wrestlers and companies.

But, today, I found a way to take some credit I had and turn it into cash, so that will help with bills for next month.  Next week, I’ll be applying for Reemployment Assistance (unemployment) and start looking for a job.  (I didn’t want to be looking for a job and have to tell people I couldn’t start until the first week of April, and there’s no way I’m missing these shows.  This is a big fucking deal to me.)

I’ve sold a couple-few things, mostly directly to friends, to generate some cash to help pay the bills.  This week, I need to get off my ass and start listing stuff on eBay and Amazon.  I’ll probably list some stuff here, too.  (Will definitely be linking to my listings on here as well.)

It’s just… it’s so fucking frustrating.  Putting 12.5 years in at a job, giving my blood, sweat and tears to them, being the one person they could ALWAYS rely on, and then being cast aside with no reason given.  It hurt.  It still hurts.  Not as bad as it did, but it hurts.

But, this week is going to be fucking awesome.  It’s going to be one of the most fun weeks of my life.  I’ll be posting about it (mostly well after the fact), though I’m sure I’ll be tweeting sporadically during/between the shows.

I work best under pressure, so I think things’ll turn out ok.  Trying not to stress over it.

As always, thanks to anyone reading.

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